New Resident From California Wonders If This Town Is “Thankful Enough”

 By Staff Writer – Herald Comical

WINCHESTER, TN — New Franklin Hills resident Carl Jacobs, who relocated from Palo Alto, California earlier this year, says he is still waiting for the people of Winchester to fully appreciate the “economic blessing” of his arrival.

Jacobs, 42, told the Herald Comical that he has “done everything in [his] power” to signal his value to the community, including buying a home “for full asking price,” purchasing “premium name-brand items” from Food City, and paying property taxes that he says are “worth at least three or four of the average locals.”

“I don’t think they realize how lucky they are that I chose Winchester,” Jacobs said while adjusting the California Republic flag he recently mounted outside his front porch. “I mean, I could’ve moved to Franklin. Or at least Thompson’s Station. But I decided to bless this town instead.”

Jacobs explained that he has not yet received a single “thank you,” “welcome, sir,” or “expression of awe” from any longtime residents, which he believes is due to a lack of awareness about his origins.

“Maybe they just don’t know I’m a transplant yet,” he said. “People around here seem friendly, but nobody has asked what my income level is. Nobody. That’s very unusual where I’m from.”

Neighbors report that Jacobs has mentioned his previous zip code “at least 14 times” during casual conversations about weather, recycling schedules, or the best place to buy mulch.

“He kept referring to himself as ‘West Coast money,’” said one Franklin Hills resident who asked to remain anonymous for fear of being added to Jacobs’ Nextdoor feed. “I’m not even sure what that means.”

Jacobs says his next step is to explore “higher-end” areas of Winchester, such as Twin Creeks, a place he believes may better “match his lifestyle and tax bracket.”

“If the people of this town want to show they appreciate me,” Jacobs said, “they can start by waving when they drive by. Or maybe asking how much my salary is. Just basic neighborly gestures.”

City officials have declined to comment, saying they “wish Mr. Jacobs all the best” and hope he enjoys his time in Winchester, regardless of "whether he receives ceremonial gratitude from the locals.”

Jacobs, meanwhile, remains optimistic.

“I’m sure eventually they’ll thank me,” he said. “It’s only a matter of time before they realize how much I’ve elevated this place.”